


The Colonel and his Paper Boy

by Stockholmsyndrom



Series: Royai Week 2019 [4]
Category: Fullmetal Alchemist (Anime 2003), Fullmetal Alchemist - All Media Types, Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood & Manga
Genre: Costumes, Disguise, Established Relationship, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-13
Updated: 2019-06-13
Packaged: 2020-05-07 07:16:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,156
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19204519
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Stockholmsyndrom/pseuds/Stockholmsyndrom
Summary: Jean Havoc discovers something about his superior officer that he wishes he hadn't. But then again, it's always good for blackmail...Or, the one with Riza dressed in boy clothes.





	The Colonel and his Paper Boy

**Author's Note:**

> This is an homage to Riza's undercover outfit from the final arch of the '03 anime. I love it so much!
> 
> Royai Week Day 4: Pinned

Maybe Jean Havoc wasn't the most observant guy. Well, he wasn't a complete idiot. Of course he could be very observant when he had to. That came with his job description as a sniper. But sometimes he took a little too long to get something.

It had taken him 13 "coincidal" run-ins with Rebecca on the shooting range to finally get that she was checking out his ass and thus might be interested in getting a drink.

But some things were just so extraordinarily huge that even he couldn't miss their importance.

 

Like seeing his boss and local womanizer, Colonel Roy Mustang, make out with a guy.

 

It had been late and Jean had been enjoying a drink with Heymans at the bar. They usually got the family discount and sometimes Mustang even paid their tab, and the girls working there were always friendly.

They had asked the Colonel to join them, but he had told them that he was otherwise preoccupied.

Jean hadn't thought much of it. Mustang tended to be "otherwisely preoccupied" a lot. And he didn't really care about it as long as that did not involve the girl he was trying to ask out. Seeing that that was no longer an issue, with Rebecca being officially his girlfriend and in East City on top of that, he hadn't made any inquiries.

So the two of them had gone without him. And they'd had fun. And they had eventually left the bar. It was pure chance that Jean had left his keys. He hadn't even noticed until he stood in front of the locked door of his apartment. And so he had come back all the way, just to find the bar closed.

He decided to try the back, maybe someone would still be there and let him in. That way he wouldn't have to wake up everybody by loudly banging on the front door.

Just as he had rounded the corner and peeked through the window to see if there was anyone, he caught glimpse of something very suspicious. There was Mustang, holding the hand of some guy. Jean couldn't see his face, but it looked like he was trying to leave.

Mustang must have been holding him back for whatever reason. Jean felt his fingers twitch, automatically getting ready to pull out his gun - the potential threat sobering him up immediately.

The guy tried to free his arm, but he didn't seem to use much force. Then Mustang tugged on it, causing the guy to turn to Mustang. But instead of breaking into a fight, the Colonel pulled the guy towards him and kissed him.

Jean's jaw hit the floor.

He was well hidden in the dark alley, and he could very well see what was going on in the backroom of the bar. The guy Mustang was kissing was a little shorter than him and his face was half hidden behind the hat he was wearing. His brown suit was a little rumpled, as if it had been lying on the floor for a while. Jean didn't quite want to think about what that meant.

But right now the unknown guy wound his arms around Mustang's shoulders and gripped at the material of his shirt - Mustang's very rumpled shirt.

They were kissing quite passionately and then the guy pushed Mustang against the wall. Jean stared, as Colonel Roy Mustang, the most notorious flirt in the military, let himself be pinned against the wall by a guy.

Jean really wished he could take a photo of this. Just so he would have blackmail material, should he ever need it.

He decided that he should leave, before one of the two discovered him. He really didn't want to be part of some awkward coming out stammering or denial from Mustang. And even though the guy was smaller than him, he had to have some strength if he could manhandle the Colonel so easily.

It looked like he would be spending the night on Heyman's couch.

 

 

Riza Hawkeye had a headache.

She hadn't slept much last night, her evening spent with a certain Colonel had kept her from following her usual routine. Even when she had finally made it back home, she had spent an hour ironing out the suit that was supposed to disguise her. Roy had all but abused it when they had been busy above the bar. She had to even look for her bra, eventually locating it on top of his large wardrobe. However he had thrown it there was still a mystery to her.

But they had needed that night. Both of them had been starving for each other, their weeks being filled with missions and late night paperwork. So when Roy had prompted her to "dust off her old shoes" she knew exactly what he wanted. And she was more than happy to give it to him.

Today she could see the relief in Roy's eyes. Lying in bed together for hours, their limbs intertwined and their heartbeats one, had given them both a much needed break - and the strength to move forward.

His laughter seemed lighter to her, more real. He had more swing in his step as he moved through the office. He only complained twice about the amount of paperwork. And he brought the leftovers of his lunch to feed them to Hayate.

Riza was happy to see him like that, really. She still didn't care for the lack of sleep it had brought her. She shouldn't have gone up with him again. She should have left on the agreed time.

Her eyes wandered towards him, he was currently leading a heated debate on the merits of short skirts for all the women in the military and whether or not that would raise morale among the male soldiers.

She sighed. Of course he passionately argued in favour of it, not even caring that Breda had long ceased listening to him. Even though he probably wouldn't mind the skirts, Breda knew better than to force his female colleagues into such a ridiculous uniform. He knew how well they could aim.

She knew that Roy was overcompensating. That he was making a show of his lecherous persona. But right now Riza needed sleep. And if she couldn't have that, she needed a quiet working environment. 

"Maybe you should push for skin-tight pants instead," Havoc interjected.

Riza raised an eyebrow at him. That was an unusual remark. Usually Havoc was right on the Colonel's side when it came to mini skirts. 

"Why?", Mustang asked, only mildly interested. 

"Because they would show off their asses..."

Mustang’s lips spread into a shit eating grin, as he agreed with his subordinate. 

"And those could be worn by both, women and men alike," Jean added with a smirk. 

Mustang just looked at him with confusion written all over his face. Riza sighed. 

Her headache had just gone from bad to worse.


End file.
